im not your puppet, so cut the strings free me from your hands. please sing me to sleep. fuck your pretty face. Im not your puppet.wish upon a star but that wont save you tonight. God has forsaken thee to Hell, we're going to hang from the sky. Feel the weight of the stone, crush hard on your chest. Confess, confess, confess before you run short of breath.
we're all Explosions in the sky. let the birth of night and day cleanse us all of our wrongs and may we see the truth in our lives. so why dont you have a seat. i scream from my eyes , hoping words could move you.
"no one will ever love me, But they sure will fuck me" Words of wisdom and pain. Suffering is only the begining of what is to come . you dont know pain until you have felt it for real. I could show you pain? Would you like that? No father...stop.. Your words are hurting me and you don't even notice? I see what kind of person you are and you can't even tell what you are yourself . its not like anyone will read this. They look and see words and look away. May we never fall in love again, for it only causes pain. Pain that stays... Just like a scar..or a bad memory,.. Something you cant forget. Ever. Those people.. I know them from somewhere. My Dreams? Possibly. But where.When?Why? Why not go say 'hello'? no...that's a bad idea. I'll never see them again anyways . Maybe i will. Hello. Hi. You seem familiar.. I dont think ive ever seen you before. Oh...okay, sorry for intruding.. i'll leave. It tastes and smells like puke. That putrid stench ..that grotesque feeling of your last meal, or not, traveling through your insides back the way it once came. Are we all meat to go back to where we once were?i don't think. Why would we. We only have one true chance to make things right. Second chances do Not exist. They are only images ... something to say to make someone feel better. A lie nonetheless . i wish there was a comfortable position to lie in while using a laptop. you've got to be able to pick up the easy meat. Why were humans built to last so long? Why not only live 48hours. And the only thing we would be focused on would be to reproduce as fast as possible and nothing else mattered. Like a fly. Or the Salmon. i smell chocolate... i hate cravings. its going to get harder as we get older . there's so much blank space i have to fill it fill it fill it fill it. Remember the Funk? Of course you dont. You remember that time when you said you loved me? Of course you dont... why did i ask. Remember when you said you'd hold me till the end of time and till the oceans dried? I do... my time is up... and my Ocean is dry. And you are neither nowhere to be seen or found . How dare you, How Could You? Why Would You? 1 ,2 .3 or 4? Blue, green, red, or purple? It says you're going to live a happy life and have good fortune. Since when does a piece of paper tell me what the fuck my life is . I dont even tell what my life is . Life doesnt tell. It fucking happens . im going to sleep hopefully . I wish i could. Fuck it, i want a popsicle/// I wish i had someone here that would get me one. Someone to love me...and i love them back. I wish i may i wish i might, have this wish i wish tonight. it too cold. Where is your heat and so called 'Love" now? i cant believe i fell for your fake and in-just lies. How Could You?HowCouldYou? i hear the dogs. they are coming after you. Or are they after me? Lets both run together just to make sure. I wouldnt want to lose you. Though you would want to lose me i feel. Quick... over the fence, they cant get us there. im so cold. I need you here. Why arent you here. And when you lose control, you'll reek the harvest you have sown. the blood boils slowly at first, increasing with rage . Rage is what fuels it, the heat and energy make it that way. I hope you have a good time, while im here being dragged down by the stone. Never to return. Maybe if there is such a thing as spirits i will see you again. Or maybe i'll just disappear. or have i already? i dont think you realise how what you are to me. A clock maker without a watch. funny isnt it. its irrelevant ,... all of it// Now i see, this is the real joke. I get it now . I understand. What is that? Something breathing on my neck? Why hello stranger. LET GO OF ME. YOU CANNOT HAVE ME YET. I WILL NOT QUIT. sometimes it seems i am just being used.there is something evil. and it wants to take me away. do i give in? or fight back. i've been fighting far to long. Maybe it is time to withdraw from the battle and turn in my arms. I don't need them anymore. Here. Here i am. Take me away please. Never to return to this dreadful place. NEVER TO RETURN. Your skin is so cold. As if you were in recent cryogenics. freeze me. freeze me and wake me up when its over. And not any sooner. Wake me up with a pat on the back. Take me out of the dream. And burn my body in the end. Id hope no one would find me. Give me to the Earth so it doesn't have to decompose my body. its been through enough don't you think? I certainly do. here they come. they are marching down the street. in their uniforms. with their guns. Oh the guns. Are they real? Of course they are. Why wouldn't they be. How did they manufacture such a great number of them. At what cost? We have the plans and currency for war and bombs but not for food and hunger? i wonder. if it were so. Here it comes hold on!! /// Now its over. everyone is dead and gone. The rivers now flow with blood and the gardens are full of bones and molten bodies. They don't even look real. Its magnificent what a body can endure and still manage to have some of it former shape. If you call that shape. here i am again. to feel what i have felt all these years . again and again . the Greeks would have battles with people and it would be a game or a show to them. Now we look back on it and we call it savage and beastly. But we are still that way. Just shadowed with more lies. deep down, we are still like that. though it may be a very very small fragment of our soul, it is there . everyone around me is in fragments. i wish i was out looking at the stars with someone. when you think about it... their light takes so long to get to us. So we only see their old sights// i bet they are beautiful. If the sun were to explode... we wouldnt know about it for another 10minutes. We would have those last ten minutes of everything.. and then we'd all die. Strange thing is.. everyone would be ready i think. its not like we are all endless. i just need someone to genuinely love me i think. no more of that bull shit i always get. im too young maybe..neither this town nor the people are for me i think. No, i know they aren't . if i am what people say about my appearance, then why dont i have someone to care about me the way i want to be. look at this, there is so much nonsensical sentences on here its ridiculous .maybe im just not digging deep enough. Ive only been to the surface i think. But ive gone so far already . it doesnt make any sense. why dont people like me. I just want love and peace in everyone. Is it so hard to ask of?i guess so ...im just in a pursuit for happiness i could call it. she said i need to get out. but then she ignores me practically. I should just stop thinking about it and get over the fact that she doesnt want to even talk to me probably because im a no good, worthless, annoying, low self-esteemed, lonely, person. im nothing. so many friends have come and gone
But all those summer nights still burn inside my lungs. i wish i was as tired as i was about 4 hours ago. i wish i was more important too. Like, someone walking up to me and saying 'you reached out to me , and changed my life'
i suppose i am asking for too much. I shouldnt even be asking for anything. Im not worth it. Im not meant to have anything. other people are to be happy and loved and im the prime example or what people would be like without that. Im just an example. A time. meaningless and stuck/ If i go insane please dont put your wires in my brain. if i go insane, will you still let me join in the game . just take me in as the prisoner that i am. throw me on the ground and spit in my face like you once did. But the fires are dead now and you have nowhere to turn. Where will you go when all have turned on you and You are all that is left. You and the air in your lungs, the blood in your veins and your heart, the intricate wires and pulses that make your brain thrive and makes you You. Is all you have. And when you are worn down like the eraser on a pencil, he will come and take you for his own. For that is where we must all go...to him. /////////Where is the battle? I can smell the sulfur, its getting stronger now. So tell me how you have been. Pretty bad. Why is that? No one ever asks how i am. I dont expect them to ask me every time im not feeling so happy. Sometime you have to tell people without them asking. But no one understands me, ive tried this. I just want to know why the way i am. Why am i so strong, and have so much willpower, no one else can even fathom what i am. And no one knows me. I think im a pretty interesting person, and i honestly feel sorry for the people that dont know me. They missed out. Well its good that you have self-confidence. How about we work on finding the source of your problem. I dont have a problem though.. The first step to solving a problem is realizing and accepting that you have it. Next is wanting to change it. I dont have a problem. I just think differently than others. I am different than others. This does not mean that i am afflicted with a 'problem'. Lets work on something else shall we? By all means, i'd love to hear what else you have to say about me. Please, continue.
There is so need to be snappy. But you can make accusations? I was not accusing of anything. You said i had a problem. Well why else would you be here? Because this is supposed to be a place for help. Not a problem solving station. You're a tough one. Thats the nicest thing you've said so far.///// Look up. Now look down. Would you rather be up there, or down there?//